Urban destruction, summer 2016 cinema-style

It’s summer. That means it’s time for major world cities to get destroyed by aliens, ghosts and/or superheroes.

It’s also time to start investing in companies that rebuild infrastructure and buildings since if you see an alien invasion force arriving you can be sure the whole city-country-world-other worlds-galaxy will be trashed.

So, in anticipation of 2016’s Marvel’s Captain America: Civil War, X-Men: Apocalypse, the rebooted Ghostbusters and the upcoming Independence Day: Resurgence, let’s look at (Earth) city destruction.

First, a little history. Most of civilization rose along rivers or coastlines. Humanity terra-formed the land, they built up (skyscrapers,) put in dams on the rivers, added dirt to the marshes (landfill) and spread out (otherwise known as urban sprawl.)

So, if world wreckers really wanted to hurt cities, they’d start with destroying bridges as is shown in the new X-Men: Apocalypse.

 

 

Then they can turn their attention to the buildings.

Let’s look at one of the aliens’ favorite targets – New York. With its iconic Empire State Building, shiny Chrysler Building (see Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer) and Wall Street, it’s sure to be the crosshairs starting in May and ending by September.

This July, it faces the new Ghostbusters. The last time the ghosts got free, they decimated the 55 Central Park West building and slimed a bureaucrat from the Environmental Protection Agency with melted marshmallows.

 

In this summer’s version, the city looks like it’ll be thoroughly slimed (which will be good for rebuilders of sewer systems.)

New York is always in a constant state of rebuilding which means some of the raw material is already at hand.

In 2012, during The Avengers a lot of midtown Manhattan was smashed fighting Loki and the alien Chitauri.

 

Trying to put a positive spin on this, it provides room in this overcrowded city for new innovative architecture that will probably be destroyed in a summer or two.

There is Washington DC, also a favorite place for alien visitations. In the 1950s, we had The Day the Earth Stood Still. The city survived. (In the remake, the alien landed in Central Park and preferred to wreck New York.)

That didn’t save the White House from destruction in 1996’s Independence Day. Since DC prefers to rebuild as closely as possible to the original probably (because most of the buildings have been deemed “historic”) when the new Independence Day: Resurgence comes out…

…the city will probably be trashed again. Maybe when they rebuild the area, they’ll get rid of the traffic circles and give Washingtonians a nice, understandable, easy-to-drive grid system like New York’s.

Other cities in the U.S. have felt alien ‘love.’ Chicago was blown up in 2011’s Transformers: Dark of the Moon. I’m sure city fathers are still rebuilding since a number of the bridges were reduced to rubble.

Maybe they can get the experts from New York to help them rebuild – when the experts can get off Manhattan Island.

The West Coast fell to invaders from outer space in Battle: Los Angeles where the aliens arrived in meteorites and proceeded to destroy the city. Hopefully, when it is rebuilt, there will be larger highways and more parking.

Going abroad, it looks like Captain America and Iron Man seem to be visiting Europe this summer…

…just as The Avengers did last summer when visiting the little-known (non-existent) Eastern European country Sokovia.

And speaking of non-existent but destroyed cities, there is always Gotham, ground zero for Batman and Superman.

If you’re going to destroy a major structure, such as Wayne Tower (see trailer), then make sure you have a multimillionaire to rebuild it.

Then there is the world.

Likely, if the world is totally destroyed, then you will have wasted your money investing in the stock market in the first place. If you’d kept it as cash, then you can at least burn the currency for warmth until the local power plants has been reconstructed.

Let the rebuilding begin!

 

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